Too much information
"Excuse me"
"You're welcome"

"Will do"

"Thank you"

I will do this on occasion -- respond to common, polite phrases from complete strangers with random and unrelated answers. These people hardly know me, if at all, and I take full advantage of it. And I don't know why. Just because? Bored? Mostly, who cares or even notices?

Recently I went to a lunch with a couple of business associates. Since the restaurant was fairly upscale, I am on my best behavior, right?

Waiter: Can I get you anything else?
Me: No problem.

Waiter: How is everything here so far?
Me: You too.

Waiter: Can I interest anyone in some dessert?
Me: My apologies.

You get the idea. Towards the end of the meal, I ask the waiter to point me in the direction of the restrooms. He nods, smiles politely, and motions down a hallway, "Coming right up".


And then he walks away, without uttering another word. Just like that. And no one else seems to notice either.

I am still chuckling to myself as we settle up the bill. On the way out, we run into our waiter  (who has now become my new personal hero):

Me: Thank you very much. The food, service, and humor were excellent!
Waiter: 8 inches
Associate #1: 8 and a half.
Associate #2: I'm out.

I stood there for what seemed like an eternity while everyone else went about their business as though nothing happened. It was only a few words, but it still took me a few moments to figure out what just unfolded -- I knew I had been beat. And not only that, I knew what I had to do as I "laid that golden fiddle on the ground at Johnny's feet".

"HEY! You coming??"
"God bless you"
"Be right there!"

I had learned my lesson. Life has a funny way of turning things around on you. So why am I not laughing?